As wives and mothers we always imagine life should be easier! We think to ourselves, ‘Everyone else seems to be coping with their kids, and their houses are clean and tidy. So why can’t I manage? What’s wrong with me?’
Amy* moved to Israel 4 years ago and had 3 children. She was slowly making new friends but missed everyone back home. She especially missed having a lot of help at home since her parents had lived nearby and were only a phone call away if she needed anything. Now though, things were tough. She didn’t feel close enough to her new friends to tell them she needed help, but she also didn’t want her family back home to worry about her, so she didn’t tell them. Her husband was working hard at a new job with a lower income and was very stressed, so she didn’t want to burden him too much either. She felt stressed, pained and alone, struggling to cope with her endless chores, so she gave me a call for a free initial consultation.
Amy felt like she wasn’t getting anything right – she wasn’t being a good mother or giving her kids the attention they needed, and they were uncooperative at bedtime. She was so tired by the time the children went to sleep that she had no energy to clean the house or sit and talk with her husband. Her home was a wreck, she had begun to put on weight and she had no time or energy to exercise. She felt that her life was in a never-ending downward spiral.
Amy needed to discover just how capable she actually was, and that she was achieving many things every day without even realizing it. I set Amy a daily task: Every evening she should write down five things that she had achieved that day. These could be simple things, like reading a story to her son, going to the park and even staying calm when her toddler had yet another tantrum. We also made a plan for a better bedtime routine. This resulted in the children having a calmer bedtime and Amy having more time for herself and her husband.
We then worked on her feelings of being alone. I set her small tasks to open up a little to her new friends – to share one small issue she was having with her kids. Amy discovered that they were a great sounding board for ideas and that she was a great sounding board for them too. This resulted in allowing Amy a real connection with her friends, who were then able to open up to her.
Amy began to take control of her life. She had more energy, felt positive and started losing weight. Her husband mentioned it was nice to see her smiling again!
If you can relate to Amy – being a regular mother who just needs a little help from a caring and dependable third party then contact me today for a free and confidential initial consultation.
*Not her real name and all identifying features have been changed.